Now

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Top 3 best days of my life:

 

My wedding

Henry’s Birthday

Yesterday

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Yes, a random Sunday in December makes the list.  In the wake of Friday’s school shooting, we, like so many Americans, took ‘off’ yesterday to focus on family.  I am not sure that I have ever been so painfully aware of the fragility of life and so cognizant of how quickly everything that I love can disappear.  It is sad to me that I need to be reminded to be so utterly grateful, but I guess that is humanity’s great battle, isn’t it?  To not get sucked into silly every day battles and stay focused on the present and the big picture?

 

The reality is that we can only live our lives in the present moment.  When we focus on what has happened or what may happen, we’re missing out on the now.  We’re missing out on what’s right in front of us.  And what’s right there is often pretty amazing – if you just look for the joy. 

 

Yesterday, we spent half an hour chasing Henry up and down this hallway.  He crawled back and forth, and handheld step by tiny step, we practiced walking.  He traveled from parent to parent, laughing and marveling at his newly-discovered ability to move

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And in those moments, nothing else mattered at all. 

 

My goal is to always remember those thirty minutes.  Truly, on my death bed, I hope yesterday is the last thing that I think about.  I want so badly to stay in the moment whenever I can.  To never again need a tragedy to remind me to be grateful.  To be present.  To love my family, my friends, and myself in the deepest, truest way that I can…. in the now.  This is my life.  And really, it’s all I’ve got. 

{ 55 comments }

 

  • Lindsey December 17, 2012, 9:03 am

    Beautiful.

  • Katie @ Talk Less, Say More December 17, 2012, 9:07 am

    Beautifully said.

  • Amanda December 17, 2012, 9:13 am

    It’s really the little things. All of them.

    Also: your house is BEAUTIFUL!

    • Caitlin December 17, 2012, 9:15 am

      Thank you <3 Yay, suburbia. 🙂

  • lisa fine December 17, 2012, 9:14 am

    In this sad, sad time of grief, it’s so true – to remember what and who is important, to stay in the moment, and to treasure our lives as much as possible, if only for a bit of time each day.

    Thank you.

  • Shari December 17, 2012, 9:21 am

    Beautifully, poignantly said.

  • Patty December 17, 2012, 9:29 am

    Amen…

  • Hillary December 17, 2012, 9:31 am

    The shooting affected me on so many levels. Besides having the overwhelming, obvious human reaction (horror) and the acutely painful reaction as a teacher (more horror, disbelief), I felt it on a more personal level, too: my best friend lives in Newtown, and her mom taught at Sandy Hook Elementary for 14 years (she just transferred out this September). I really sunk into the grief hole this weekend, and it was hard to pull myself out. But I had a moment like you had where I realized that, in spite of having NO CONTROL over what happens to me or my loved ones (on so many scary levels), I do have control over the time I have with them. I hope I never, ever need another reminder of that for the rest of my life.

  • Molly @ Happy&Healthy December 17, 2012, 9:42 am

    Amazing post, thanks for this.

  • Natalie @ Free Range Human December 17, 2012, 9:53 am

    This is a beautiful thought, and something I hope we all hold on to as we move on from this terrible tragedy.

  • Colleen December 17, 2012, 10:04 am

    Simply beautiful. We too took time off this weekend to focus on our family. We only get one chance, make it count.

  • Carly December 17, 2012, 10:12 am

    This is beautiful, thank you.

  • Mariel December 17, 2012, 10:34 am

    Very beautifully said Caitlin…

  • Christine @ BookishlyB December 17, 2012, 10:39 am

    Not to take away from your heartfelt message (which it was, simple and sweet), but I LOVE the shape of your doorways.

  • Lauren December 17, 2012, 10:40 am

    Like everyone else said. Absolutely beautiful.

  • Sarah @ Yogi in Action December 17, 2012, 10:40 am

    I agree with all other comments- absolutely beautiful!

  • Janelle December 17, 2012, 11:07 am

    Lovely and so true.

  • Kelli December 17, 2012, 11:32 am

    agree agree agree. i decided to look for all the good in the world this weekend. there is so much 🙂

  • Katie @peacebeme December 17, 2012, 11:45 am

    Really amazing post today.

  • Katie @ Soulshine and Sassafras December 17, 2012, 11:50 am

    This is beautiful. Thank you.

  • Courtney December 17, 2012, 11:56 am

    This is absolutely lovely. 😀

  • Laura @ She Eats Well December 17, 2012, 12:03 pm

    Agree. Agree. Agree. Peace & Love.

  • Leah December 17, 2012, 12:08 pm

    I love your blog, but I hardly ever comment. I just have to say that this is truly beautiful. You are a wonderful role model for women.

  • Carolina John December 17, 2012, 12:11 pm

    that’s really cool. Getting the little man walking and mobile is just as cool as gaining the appreciation for those moments. Good call.

  • Katie @ Peace Love & Oats December 17, 2012, 12:18 pm

    Beautiful post. I think it’s so important for us to stop and reflect all the amazing things that we have in our lives right now, that may seem small but are really what make life worthwhile.

  • Hannah December 17, 2012, 12:27 pm

    Exactly what I needed to hear. Today I am saying goodbye to my cat of 17 years and remembering my dad on what would have been his 49th birthday. Funny how the universe works.

  • Susan December 17, 2012, 12:43 pm

    Such a beautiful post. I grew up in Newtown CT, and still live in the area. I am beyond sad. Thank you so much, your words were just what I needed to hear.

  • allison December 17, 2012, 12:52 pm

    This is so touching. What a beautiful post.

  • Abby December 17, 2012, 12:55 pm

    So beautiful. We too took time to just be together. I think I have said I love you to my babies 1o times every hour. Thank you for sharing!

  • Aja December 17, 2012, 1:34 pm

    That sounds just perfect. If only every day could be spent just living in the moment.

  • Kristen L December 17, 2012, 2:09 pm

    Beautiful post. I truly hope you can remember every second of yesterday too. It can be so easy to get caught up in the craziness of life and forget to live in the moment. It is always good to step back and enjoy what we have.

  • Susan December 17, 2012, 2:58 pm

    I would love to see some pics of Henry crawling that l-o-n-g hallway and trying to walk with Mom and Dad! You know what they say, once they start crawling—look out!

  • jen December 17, 2012, 3:14 pm

    yes. yes. yes.

  • jackie December 17, 2012, 3:50 pm

    Thank you so much for this. I actually had a very similar day yesterday in the sense that I told my husband today it was one of the best days because we too laughed and enjoyed those little moments together. Thank you for reminding me to savor those moments because life is so incredibly precious

  • Alett December 17, 2012, 4:55 pm

    I am so choked up I can barely type through the tears welling up in my eyes.

    …taking a moment to gather composure…

    yesterday as I was out on a reeeeeaalllly long 18 mile run in the freezing rain I was contemplating a blog post (I started a running blog to track my training for the Boston marathon). I basically was thinking along the lines of what you already eloquently stated – live in the moment; appreciate the “present” of THE present because you never know when it can be taken away. So even though the freezing rain was pelting away at my face for 3.5 hours I felt SO very lucky to be out there doing one of the things that I love.

    xo

  • Abby December 17, 2012, 5:09 pm

    This is beautiful. In the middle of all of the heart break and sorrow it is so important to remember how blessed we truly are.

  • Ashley December 17, 2012, 5:36 pm

    Well said 🙂 Thanks for the reminder 🙂

  • Hannah December 17, 2012, 5:47 pm

    love this. how wonderful. thank you

  • Angela December 17, 2012, 8:55 pm

    I needed to hear this today. Such beautiful words….thank you!

  • Maggie December 17, 2012, 9:03 pm

    Such a good reminder. It’s truly the little things in life that matter the most. Thanks for the inspiration!

  • Rebekah at Another World is Probable. December 17, 2012, 9:05 pm

    Well said. I wrote something similar yesterday called “Living in Reality.” It’s so easy to get caught in the “I’ll be happy when” track when really all we have is the here and now.

  • Allison@commitcomplete December 17, 2012, 9:18 pm

    Life’s meaning is in its moments 🙂

  • Jennifer December 17, 2012, 9:30 pm

    I needed this in a bad way!! Thank u so much 🙂

  • Erin December 18, 2012, 12:30 am

    Such beautiful words, thank you for reminding me to savor the moments I have with my family and friends and be in the present. That visual of Henry really hits home, what a wonderful message!

  • Angela December 18, 2012, 2:12 am

    Beautifully written! At least there is some good that can come out of such a horrific tragedy.

  • Julia @ Brides Up North December 18, 2012, 6:34 am

    So true.

  • Mel December 18, 2012, 9:39 am

    Great words. Beauty rests in the simplest of things and the seemingly ordinary activities of our day.

  • MomHTP December 18, 2012, 3:50 pm

    No words but I can tell you that to hear you focus on gratitude makes me so happy for you.
    You are Beautiful.

  • Danielle December 19, 2012, 12:03 am

    I needed this today. Thank you for your beautiful words <3

  • Julie December 19, 2012, 3:56 pm

    Amen!

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