I’m Having a Major Life Bonk

on March 28, 2009

Good morning! I hope you’re having a pleasant Saturday so far! I slept until 9 AM (woo hoo), which felt GREAT. After groggily stumbling into the kitchen, I made myself a nice pre-run snack.

I had coffee and WW toast with 1 tablespoon of PB. And then I set off on my 4.0 mile run…. I skipped yesterday’s run, so I was making up for lost mileage today.

It’s overcast and windy outside, which made for perfect running weather. Running into the wind felt a little challenging, but the second part of my run was so much easier with the breeze on my back.

Duration: 38 minutes (4.0 miles)
Calories Burned: 320 (estimate)

I came home and popped the 30 Day Shred into the DVD player… but the 1st circuit DRAGGED on and every time I jumped up and down I could feel the blood throbbing against my temples. I turned off Jillian 5 minutes into exercise. Maybe I’ll try again later.

My breakfast was really a brunch since I ate it at 11:30. :) Oatmeal is good any time of the day!

My oatmeal contained:

1/2 cup oatmeal
1/2 cup water
1/2 cup milk
1 sliced banana
Toppings: unsweetened coconut, brown sugar, chopped pecans

I’m Having a Major Life Bonk

Definition of A Bonk: In endurance sports, particularly cycling and running, hitting the wall or the bonk describes the condition when an athlete suddenly loses energy and becomes fatigued.

Lately, I’ve been feeling really overwhelmed. It’s manifesting itself in my running. It’s been a REAL struggle to maintain my normal mileage (20 miles) every week since Gasparilla Weekend (Part I, Part II). I haven’t felt like running AT ALL and I usually feel exhausted after a run, not invigorated.

My progress of the Crooms’ 15.0 Mile Trail Run is evidence of my bonk:

Week	Training Plan Required Mileage	Actual Mileage
1	19 miles	14 miles
2	21 miles	9 miles
3	23 miles	13 miles (so far; 23 miles tomorrow, hopefully)

I was thinking about my life bonk on this morning’s run and realized that in the last 8 months:

I’ve gotten married
Worked a stressful full-time job
Worked a part-time job at the holistic clinic/website
Blogged three times a day (trust me, its a part-time job as well)
Trained for and raced in three 5Ks, two 10Ks, two 15Ks, and two Half Marathons.

I’m overwhelmed.

I hate to admit that because I want to be a good example. I want to show my readers you can DO IT ALL. And I feel like I have been doing it all for the last 8 months. But now I’m bonking to the point that I don’t even want to go on a 4.0 mile run. I need a break. Running isn’t fun anymore. I’m not living my life in balance anymore. I can’t stop working, but I can stop running like a manic.

After the 15.0 mile trail run, I’m cutting down on long distances for the foreseeable future. Luckily, race season is over in Florida so I won’t be tempted to sign up for any Half Marathons! If I’m not actively training for something, it’s OK to drop to 12 – 15 mile weeks. I think it will make me happier and less stressed. Hopefully, I’ll be mentally ready to start training again by the end of the summer and will be able to enjoy the next race season fully.

Whew — it feels good to just type all that out!

{ 65 comments }

ttfn300 March 28, 2009, 9:21 am
oh no! sorry you’re feeling like that, but it’s good to take a break when you need to. you’ll be back at it in no time 🙂 have a great weekend!
sloank March 28, 2009, 9:21 am
I have to say Caitlin… I’m glad to see you’re human!!! I hit a “bonk” a month ago and was worried I was lazy and just making excuses for myself. It’s nice to see everyone gets tired and needs to stop and take a break! I definitely think you are making a great example by saying you need to rest!! I hope you give yourself a break!!
Angie Eats Peace March 28, 2009, 9:23 am
I have felt the same way before with running. Especially after my 1st marathon, it started to feel way more like a chore, rather than something that I healthily enjoyed.
Scaling back my miles was definitely beneficial, and helped me regain perspective on why I started running in the first place.
Best of luck.
*One Step at a Time* March 28, 2009, 9:24 am
YOU ARE HUMAN!! It is okay to feel this way. If running isn’t enjoyable for you at the moment and you feel like it is more “work” than “pleasure” then CUT BACK!! You have the right mentality about it so just follow your heart! There has to be balance in everything we do! GOOD LUCK! 🙂
Colleen March 28, 2009, 9:25 am
I hear you! Working full time and taking 3 classes at night, I’ve felt a major bonk lately with my running as well. I just go with it and do what I can!

You are setting the best example by admitting to this and giving yourself a break – please don’t feel bad about it at all!
Beth March 28, 2009, 9:41 am
I only do one distance event per year. The rest of the time, I only run 2 days per week and focus the rest of my efforts on interval training and strength. It makes me stronger for the distance events and doesn’t burn me out!
therunningaddict March 28, 2009, 9:44 am
I have never ran long distances but I can understand how it can be overwhelming!
inmytummy March 28, 2009, 9:49 am
I’ve gone through that before, to the point of not racing certain events that I had planned to. It’s best to listen to your body. If you feel overwhelmed from running, it’s okay to take a break. I was worried that I’d lose my endurance ability, but I was able to gain it back once I felt the desire to run again.
ksgoodeats March 28, 2009, 9:52 am
It’s okay to feel a little bonked out! That’s natural, especially after all the craziness that has been going on in your life lately. Take some time for yourself 🙂
Casey March 28, 2009, 9:53 am
You are definitely human for feeling that way! Everyone gets a little “tired” of the same (pretty exhausting!) routine eventually. You also have to remember in the past month you started working an extra two hours a day, plus doing the “shred” challenge (not to mention blogging, running, being married and a good friend!). Two hours may not seem like a lot but I have a feeling it has a lot to do with how you’re feeling.

Never cut things out of your life that truly make you happy, but it’s possible you are doing too much of those things – limiting them will never hurt you!!
keri March 28, 2009, 9:55 am
I don’t usually take the time to comment, but I had to say that, like everyone else, I am glad that you aren’t afraid to talk about your “life bonk”! I have had periods like that in my life too – like most of the last year, trying to balance getting a paper published for grad school and maintain a healthy lifestyle even with the long work hours, mental strain, etc.
It really can be overwhelming, but as much as it might hurt to admit that you’re human and privy to life’s stresses, scaling back and cutting yourself some slack will help! You’ve been through a lot of changes in the last year, and taking some time to collect yourself will make you stronger in the long run.
Caitlin at Healthy Tipping Point March 28, 2009, 9:57 am
i appreciate your support and kind words wayyyy more than you guys know!!!
VeggieGirl March 28, 2009, 10:03 am
Loove the oats!!

Oh no, don’t feel overwhelmed, dear Caitlin!! You WILL be back to your old fabulous running self when the time is right.
Erin March 28, 2009, 10:07 am
I think its great you’ve realized what you need to do and aren’t just overwhelming yourself. You have a full, busy life and running should be fun! Thats why you started it in the first place. Thanks for sharing about this and I’m sure you’ll be much happier to have a more balanced lifestyle.
Julie March 28, 2009, 10:19 am
Good for you! Sometimes you need a break.
Mica March 28, 2009, 10:20 am
Wow, that is an intense list for the past 8 months. I think post-race burnout is normal, not even counting all the additional stuff you have on your plate. Luckily, it sounds like you know what you need to do to get through this bonk!

🙂 You can dooooo it!
Nicole (anotheronebitesthecrust.wordpress.com) March 28, 2009, 10:25 am
It’s good that you can take charge and realize when you need a break! I hope today is super relaxing for you! 🙂
runningwithin March 28, 2009, 10:26 am
Hey Caitlin, I just wanted to tell you how much I respect you for taking it easy on yourself, like you’ve spoken about before, I know you have to fight an all or nothing attitude and the fact that you are taking it easy, listening to your body and telling yourself its ok, just shows what a smart strong woman you are, go you! : )
lilveggiepatch March 28, 2009, 10:35 am
You’re an inspiration whether you’re running 30 or 5 mile weeks. You do so much and your positivity is really, well, inspiring! (Let’s see how many variations of that word I can come up with, eh?) As always, thanks for your honesty. Hope your bonk lets up a little. Have a GREAT day, Caitlin!
RunToFinish March 28, 2009, 10:39 am
You know some times a short break is just what you need. If you can find some personal time to think about what is most important, you’ll quickly find where your joy lies and be able to focus on those things. You’re doing a great job handling it all and generally keeping a great attitude so it could just be an off day too.

good luck and hey you’ve always got us!
All Vegged Out March 28, 2009, 10:47 am
I don’t think cutting back is being a bad example… too often we try to be everything and do everything and end up burning ourselves out… I think saying “hey, I need to cut back” is being a great example because you’re listening to your body, heart and mind… all lessons that some of us (me) need to learn and hearing it from someone who inspires me (like you) makes me feel a lot better about saying “no” once in awhile… so Thank you!
Tyler March 28, 2009, 10:57 am
absolutely take a break when you need to!! you don’t want to burn yourself out! one of my good friends who could run a 5 minute mile in high school hasn’t run a step since we graduated b/c she ran so much in high school that she got sick of it and it stressed her out more than it made her happy! and once you have a good endurance base (which it seems like you do) you can cut back on your running a lot for a few months and pick it back up when you want to! good luck!
Justine March 28, 2009, 10:58 am
I’m glad to hear you’re cutting back and listening to your body before you’re completely burnt out! You’ve done a ton of races recently, so having a little down time from running and just running when you feel like it will do you some good. My first half is tomorrow and I have no idea how you’ve prepared for all these races the past few months…just training for one can be a lot!
I’m sure you’ll get that lovin’ feeling back for running soon enough! 🙂
SweetPea March 28, 2009, 11:04 am
I’m new to your blog and have really enjoyed reading your old posts and I’m slowly catching up to your more recent ones.

Like so many other people have said, it’s okay to feel overwhelmed with life! You are doing A LOT of different things and sometimes it’s okay to take a step back and say “it’s enough”. Take care of yourself 🙂

Oh, and I’m also from Florida! I’m on the East Coast, but it’s nice to follow someone else who has to deal with the incredibly humid running weather as we come into the summer.
D10 March 28, 2009, 11:05 am
You definitely need to enjoy running (for the most part!) and you need to enjoy life. You have been crazy busy, enjoy some down time. You can do it all, but sometimes you have to take a break and reevaluate everything. Rest up, explore some new activities and have fun.
Leanne March 28, 2009, 11:11 am
I really commend you for writing up this post, Caitlin. It’s great to see honesty on blogs… another reason why yours is one of my favorites:-)
Laughing Lindsay March 28, 2009, 11:17 am
Hey girl… Been forever since we’ve chatted!

1. I’m SOO proud of you for what you’ve accomplished in ONLY 8 MONTHS. Seriously, look at the average person. Most don’t accomplish this in their entire lifetime. You DESERVE to take it easy for as long as you want. (Your body deserves it too.)

2. You mentioned a little while ago that you wanted to focus on your creative writing a little more. Maybe keep up the good work using this angle. It will exercise your brain this way.. see, still squeezing in a good work out!

3. High 5 for acknowledging these thoughts and your body telling you to slow down. Double high 5 for sharing it with us. I think we get used to running a 10 ring circus so the reminder is a great eye opener to only run a 3 ring.

Love ya girl. Huge Hugs
Mara @ What's For Dinner? March 28, 2009, 11:19 am
Kudos to you for acknowledging the “bonk”! I think thats a huge step in itself!
Susan March 28, 2009, 11:48 am
It is 100% okay to slow down and take a break sometimes! Luckily you realized before you got even more overwhelmed! Running is supposed to be fun. I always have to remind myself of that when I start pushing myself too hard or stressing out about my goals and workouts. Take your time to rest up and relish in your time off. 🙂 You deserve the break!!
runsarah March 28, 2009, 11:52 am
Thanks for sharing. It sounds like the last 8 months have been absolutely crazy and busy for you. I don’t run as much as you do and I can’t imagine running too much more at this point.
Brandi March 28, 2009, 12:02 pm
I guess that’s the good and bad thing about Florida – there’s a running “season” so you only have so many months that they have races, and it makes you clump them closer together than you might otherwise in a different part of the country.

you do have a lot on your plate, and I think ending this running season with the trail run will be a great way to stop the craziness and just do what you want for a while 🙂

I love the work bonk, though. It’s fun to say!
teacherwoman March 28, 2009, 12:03 pm
It can so be so hard to juggle life and training. I am sorry to hear about your frustrations. A little down time after the trail run should be nice and help you feel refreshed.
Jen March 28, 2009, 12:07 pm
Caitlin, you are so right about needing to take a break – it’s totally fine! Do the things that make you feel the best; if running doesn’t leave you invigorated, it really is OKAY to cut back! And you don’t have to do it all, we love you anyways 🙂
Holly March 28, 2009, 12:20 pm
Caitlin, I’m a long time lurker but really wanted to respond to your post. Do NOT feel guilty or bad about it. I think you realize you really need a break. I’ve trained for marathons and have realized that if my mind/body/soul don’t get a break once in awhile, I will physically, mentally, and spiritually start to fail. I think it’s wonderful that YOU recognized this. It took another person to bring it to my attention for me. Exercise should be fun. LIFE should be fun. Not an effort. Good for you for recognziing that! And I think you will find that in time (months, a year, whatever), you will willing step back up your mileage when your body and mind is ready. Don’t force it – you do really well listening to your body and that will carry you far.
talesofexpansion March 28, 2009, 12:47 pm
good for you for taking time to re-evaluate all your responsibilities and making necessary adjustments to maintain your sanity!! you’re doing the right thing — sometimes it’s harder to cut back than to add on because you feel like you’re failing BUT YOU’RE NOT! it takes a stronger person to make positive changes the way you’re doing it 🙂
Adi (oatonomy.com) March 28, 2009, 1:41 pm
Thank you for being a great example by listening to your body and knowing yourself, and being willing to take a break! That’s being a role model more than “trying to do it all” is.
Laura in Pittsburgh March 28, 2009, 1:43 pm
It’s funny you posted this today, because I’ve been feeling the same way! You need to listen to your body and it sounds like a great idea to scale back on mileage after your 15 mile trail race. I’m training for my 2nd marathon and the distance runs are really a drag this time around. I’m going to follow your lead after May 3rd and resume my “pre-marathon” workouts and mileage. You set such a great example for your readers – thank you!
Suzanne March 28, 2009, 2:06 pm
Caitlin–idea for you….

People do abuse the “I don’t have time” excuse, but serious mileage means some SERIOUS (when oh when will blogger let us make italics instead of having to shout) time commitment. The run itself can last quite awhile, obv, and then plus there is the before/after prep/dressing/stretching/shower/eating/possibly even driving to a running location, etc.
I don’t see when you have time to do day-to-day stuff, errands, cleaning, dogduty; hell I remember when I was so busy in college that I literally would have to put “clip fingernails” on my to-do list! Also, running (I imagine) takes precious time away from your new husband.

I know the husband likes sports; do you (and I’m sorry if you’ve addressed this before) care for any that you and the husband could do together? Something that could effective function as a workout disguised as just doing something fun with the one you love? Tennis is a great couples sport. Pitch and catch is classic. Throw the football around. Go to a playground and make up a fun obstacle course. Go to Target and buy some ridiculious kids toy and just PLAY. Kick a soccer ball back and forth. Do something active and fun together. I don’t know if you guys have conflicting schedules, but just an idea!
eatingRD March 28, 2009, 2:27 pm
Yes, take it easy! No need to not have fun and be overwhelmed. Last week I think I had a life bonk too. Just graduate school, full-time job and blogging and getting ready to buy a house really got to me and I got very overwhelmed. It’s best to find the balance again and take a big deep breath and not do quite so much! Hang in there 🙂
Kristi March 28, 2009, 2:31 pm
Sorry you are feeling overwelmed. You definitely have done a LOT and I think you are right in giving yourself a break. And heck, even if you do get in 12-15 miles a week, I still say that is awesome!

Keep your head up! 🙂
Tami March 28, 2009, 2:45 pm
sorry you are feeling this way. i think it’s a natural progression of exercising and living a good life. i want to run a marathon but i don’t want to hate running afterward….
Suzanne March 28, 2009, 3:04 pm
And/or in addition, if finances permit, you and the husband could take a dance class together? There are some very reasonable ones at YMCAs or even low and no cost clubs. You guys could be swingers (and you know I pronounced it “schwingers” in my head) or do some salsa, whatev. Dancing is the best exercise! And dancing with him would be like a fourfold benefit opportunity: fun, exercise, stressrelief, and couples quality time. Dancing is a multi-tasker.
Bec March 28, 2009, 3:05 pm
Wow, you have had a busy 8 months! You definitely deserve a break 🙂
Anonymous March 28, 2009, 3:07 pm
If I scroll down and look at your food over the last few days (especially the last few days) I see very very few vegetables, little fruit, and lots of bread,cereal, processed carbs. Perhaps your diet has something to do with your lack of energy?
Elizabeth March 28, 2009, 3:18 pm
Long time lurker..just thought I’d add my .02

I was a college athlete and hit a MAJOR wall. I used to love working out, spending time in the gym – any physical activity really. I stopped playing basketball all together for about 2 years because I stopped having fun. I was tired and played injured all the time.

I still stayed active, but in much different, much less strenuous ways. Taking that time off was probably the best thing I ever did for myself. I started playing basketball again about 2 years ago, casually at first, and then it was like I rediscovered this love I had for bball. I began playing semi-professionally, got back in good shape and now I miss it like crazy (I left where I was playing to pursue my masters).

I guess the point of my long-winded story is to say it’s ok to feel the way you do. I think the best thing I did for myself was to slow down. It gave me time to re-energize, heal and really think about what I wanted.

There was a time when all I wanted was to never play again and now I can’t think of what my life would be like without it.

Good luck to you!
Aimee March 28, 2009, 3:27 pm
Hang in there. You have had a lot on your plate, so don’t be hard on yourself. It sounds like some rest from running will be great for you, and well deserved!
... March 28, 2009, 3:42 pm
Caitlin, you are such a strong and inpsiring woman that no matter how many days you may feel “bonked” you must remember that your strength and beauty truly reflect on so many others. You share so much about your life, passions, and inner feelings and provide so many with uplifting ideas and support. I think you definitely need to take a day or two just for yourself. Take a day off from the world and just reflect, meditate, pray…it will do your heart, body and mind good! You DESERVE IT!!!
Meredith (Pursuing Balance) March 28, 2009, 4:06 pm
If running is becoming more stressful than fun and invigorating, then you should definitely take a break! It’s really awesome of you to recognize this! I think one of the problems women today often face is this idea that we should be superwoman all the time, constantly running around and accomplishing a million things. It’s just as important that we sit back, relax, and take care of ourselves 🙂
mclaugkm March 28, 2009, 4:11 pm
caitlin…i often wonder how you and so many other food bloggers keep up the schedules y’all do. taking a break from blogging, running, eating well happens to all of us and is what makes us human. thank you for taking the time to take a break for yourself and breathe.
theskinnyplate March 28, 2009, 4:16 pm
So sorry to hear that. Take some time for yourself. Hope you feel better soon.
redheadedjournal March 28, 2009, 4:27 pm
I think every runner has ups and downs. I think it’s very important (and good for your body) to take breaks from running tons every week. I’ve been feeling the same way. Sometimes life gets a bit demanding! 🙂
jane March 28, 2009, 4:52 pm
i’ve never heard the term “bonk” before, what a funny sounding word. on a more serious note, you are only human and there’s nothing wrong with catching your breath. i tell runners all the time that if they want to be runners forever then they need to be willing to give their body a break every once and awhile. glad you understand that 🙂
livelovelaugheatlearn March 28, 2009, 5:11 pm
I’m so sorry you’re feeling bonked!!! Totally understandable though! That is so much in only 8 months!!! Be proud of youreself for how much you do!

I only blog once a day and it takes up tons of my time, I can only imagine how much three times takes!
Eat, Live, Love, Dream March 28, 2009, 5:27 pm
Good for you!!! It has to be fun! Exercising is like a an amazing entree at a restaurant or extremely good treat (dessert) you get excited for it and savor it. But if you have it too much, it just sadly, aint that good, or exciting. I see exercise the same way:) so good for you cutting back a little:)
jenn March 28, 2009, 5:29 pm
don’t worry, you are totally a great example. and even more so by saying ‘hey, i hit a life/running/whatever bonk to just like everyone else’. sometimes you just need to slow down to get yourself back up to speed again, if that makes sense.
and seriously you are a great role model, my running and over healthiness has greatly improved since entering the blog world as a reader, and it was pretty impressive to start. i can happily say im running my first 10k in may and honestly this might not be happening if it weren’t for you, meghann, or jenna. you guys inspire (and sometimes make me feel like a slacker) me with your crazy running!!
Michelle March 28, 2009, 5:45 pm
Wow that’s a lot of training and a lot going on. You should give yourself a hug, but honestly you’ve done amazing things. I barely could get through 2.5 miles today.

Not that you need more ideas..but have you thought about incorporating yoga, pilates..something that will challenge you…but perhaps be able to unwind your mind/body in a different way? It saves me. There’s a great website by this lovely lady names polly and she has 10 minute videos which focus on specific areas…especially those for runners and long distancers. http://yogapol.typepad.com/yogayum/

Anoter great one is yogadownloads.com

Remember life is about enjoying the journey..it’s ok if you’re not perfect.

Good luck…you inspire me!
Michelle
Abby March 28, 2009, 5:47 pm
It’s funny, I had a similar life bonk last summer (which, in fact, is why I started this blog – http://abbyperkiss.blogspot.com/2008/06/taking-long-road.html).

Take it easy, and try not to beat yourself up – sounds like you can definitely use a little bit of a break!
Rachel March 28, 2009, 6:00 pm
Good for you Caitlin!!! I always seem to get injured when I keep running even though my body needs a break…so that’s another bonus to adjusting your running routine.
Kristin March 28, 2009, 6:07 pm
It happens to be the best of us! After your race take some time for you! 🙂
Caitlin at Healthy Tipping Point March 28, 2009, 6:16 pm
thank you guys AGAIN – thank you, thank you.
Sheri March 28, 2009, 6:53 pm
From what you have been through the last 8 months I would say you sure DO need a break! Good for you for recongnizing it! Take a much needed rest and you will be back at if before you know it!
Niki March 28, 2009, 8:11 pm
Caitlin….we all hit those walls, what I would think might help(besides the night you had tonight:-)) would be to do more cross training, then while doing that you may miss running and you will still be getting a good workout in too. Have a good night!
-Niki
http://www.willrun4cake.blogspot.com/
Christine March 29, 2009, 5:23 am
If you look back through my running histories..I’ve bonked from the same exact things before. In 3 weeks I graduated undergrad, got married, moved across the country, went on a honeymoon, started grad school, hubby got a new job etc. I then began training for races in the middle of intense grad school. I really think these “bonks” are good for us and actually allow us to become better conditioned runners. Sometimes your body gets SOOO used to what you do..that you have to take a step back before you can continue to progress. I’ve even had to take mental breaks from blogging in the past as well..because I couldn’t even think of what to say and it was stressing me out.

Unwanted stress has wayyyy too many negatives..so take life as it comes. Take breaks when you need them…pick back up when you feel strong again. Life is a marathon..there are many water stops…calf cramps..along the way. There are times when you feel strong and can speed up..and times when you are climbing a hill and might need to walk. As long as you continue to put one foot in front of the other you will end up with a medal at the end.
lauren March 30, 2009, 8:44 am
I am so way behind, but wanted to comment on this. You have had so much going on – it is natural to need a break!

After running 2 marathons last year – this year has been all about mixing it up and it feels so nice and relaxing. Not many long distance races and I am doing different things – all for fun.

I have no doubt you will find your balance. 🙂
Oh She Glows April 8, 2009, 2:46 pm
I think you’d be doing your readers more of a disservice by telling them you can DO IT ALL…I really don’t buy into that in my own life (Ive tried many times and ended up stressed beyond belief) and at some point something has to give. I REALLY appreciate your honesty with how you are feeling, and I suspect your readers do too! I hope everything works out for you 🙂

Previous post: Nap > Run (Today)

Next post: Cutting Loose