I agree with Courtney (above) – it’s up to the adults to lead by example. I’m very blessed that my parents did that.

Happy Thursday, Caitlin!!!

That article is SO SAD! I almost cried when I read these kids “go to birthday parties, and if it’s not a granola cake they feel like they can’t eat it.” What a childhood!

I totally agree with leading by example to teach your kids healthy eating, but that means being an example of enjoying life and not freaking out about birthday cake too. Special events like that are what make being a kid fun, and can definitely be balanced by three healthy home-cooked meals on an every day basis.

Gosh what a sad and interesting article. I feel like it’s such a hard job to balance trying to teach kids to be healthy while also making sure they are enjoying food and having fun without obsessing over anything.

My parents did a pretty good job I think. My brother and I would always beg for McDonalds and Burger King and stuff and sometimes we’d get it, sometimes we wouldn’t. (We could usually convince my dad ;)) My mom would make me a healthy lunch every day to bring to school, so I was never into buying food at school. While we were def allowed to have soda and some junk food in the house, we weren’t allowed to go overboard (we could never get our parents to buy us fruit roll ups!!). Being allowed to have indulgences sometimes as something fun was good and didn’t make me grow up feeling guilty about wanting ice cream or obsessing over calories/ingredients or anything. In fact I don’t remember having any thoughts worrying about food. It wasn’t until college that I really started learning and getting interested in nutrition and healthy eating on my own.

This is an interesting point. I guess you just have to lead by the best example possible.

…or maybe we should send all of our children to France, so they can learn how to eat pastries in moderation and stay slim.

Love the oatmeal, and hope your router gets it junk together!

I hope you don’t mind this being a lengthy comment, but I’m really passionate about this! Please, please, please don’t raise your children to have any association with GUILT around food! The second that you “ban” a food, drink or candy from your household, the more your child will crave it once they leave the nest. For example, I have a lot of friends who weren’t allowed to drink soda growing up; then they got to college and drank it with every meal because THEY COULD. What’s more important than allowing a food vs. not allowing a food is establishing a general healthy atmosphere. Eat by example! You are the perfect example of a healthy, balanced, moderated eater, and your kids can grow and learn from that instead of being affected by it. Be very strict about eating meals at a family, and serve healthy foods that you know they will love! If they are insistant upon Kraft Mac and Cheese, try making your own, healthier version one night and serve that instead. Don’t lecture them about Trans Fat, Corn Syrup, ect. until they are old enough to really understand. Believe me, as someone who is still in school, they DRILL THAT STUFF IN OUR BRAINS! Society as a whole is gaining awareness and getting healthier each day, so you can be sure that it won’t be hard for them to make healthy choices. Your kids are going to eat out and eat at friends’ houses where “junk food” will be present, but that’s okay! I just wish that I grew up knowing that, and not feeling like having control over food made me a better person.

Phew! Sorry for that. I hope you got at least something out of it! Just thought it would help to get a point of view from someone who was definitely aware of this growing up.

Oh, and I love how you say you will NOT participate in “fat talk”. That’s the best thing you can do. 🙂

My parents never pushed healthy eating on me, I just kind of picked it up myself when I started running. Better fuel in the tank means better runs.

This is actually something that I worry about a lot should I ever have children. I’ve mentioned before in my blog that some of my “issues” with food definitely stem from issues that my mother has which stem from my grandmother.

The way I see it, there are two negative things that can come from having an orthorexic parent and, for me, they both happened at different times in my life. When I was a kid, I wasn’t allowed to have junk food, so I went to my friends houses and gorged on the stuff that their parents let them have and became overweight. Not healthy. And then when I was older, I harbored some very disordered thoughts toward food and was very rigid in my food choices.

At least now I realize (and from your post, you do too) that being a so-called orthorexic is not always 100% good. I think as long as we acknowledge that, we can set good examples for our children.

Sorry, this was really long! Just a subject that hits close to home for me.

My mom has been fixated and obsessed on eating my entire life. All I hear is about her “fasting” days, etc etc.. it has definitely screwed me up big time in relation to food. When I have kids, I will never discuss my own body issues. I will serve them a healthy, well balanced diet with the occasional treat and trip to McDonalds because they are kids after all! But I will do my best to set an example of eating healthfully.

I did like my mom’s rule that we were only allowed to have sugar cereals on our birthday and Hanukkah — they were a major treat, but I ate healthy cereals the rest of the time!

This is such an interesting issue… I didn’t have time to read all the comments so I’m sorry if I sound repetitive of others.

I think by involving kids in cooking and meal planning, then teaching them about real, whole foods vs. processed, they will naturally acquire a taste for the healthy choices.

Encouraging them to at least TRY everything is also good.

I have two kids and while they love chocolate (dark too!) they also love carrots and broccoli and peppers and so many other fruits and veggies. Honestly the fact that kids don’t like veggies is a myth. (i know some don’t) I lead by example. Sure they don’t eat perfect, but when i cook dinner their favorites are veggie fajitas and stir fry so i know i’m doing something right.
My mom taught us to eat healthy too. We never had sugar cereal in our house, no snack packs, or doritos, we rarely had desert, and we always had wheat bread. Our snacks were popcorn, we only got diet soda (one can) on pizza night. We used to bike to dairy queen for a treat. We took walks after family gatherings where we overindulged. My mom never talked bad about her body. After having kids, she worked out hard and ate healthier, she never cut out foods or did crazy fad diets. She really was amazing in that department!
When i had my kids and didn’t give them junk for two years, mil was hounding me about not giving my 8mo old ice cream and my mom was patting my back.
I think worrying about it is silly. You have a healthy body image, you work out , and eat healthy, your kids will see that. They will see your not so perfect side too, and that will teach them balance. Just the fact that you are worried about this now means you care enough to be a great parent!

I agree. I too am kind of scared of having kids because I don’t want them to live with the difficult relationship with food that I have. I am trying to overcome it but I am not sure I ever will and I don’t want to pass it on to my sprogs. Good post.

kids have different nutritional requirements than adults do anyway. i can’t get my kids to eat anything, and the doctors think they are underweight. so it’s a problem.

you, however, should not be scared about having kids. you will love it.

Raising children of my own is still a few years away for me – but through babysitting and taking care of neices, nephews, etc, I’ve gotten a pretty good idea about “what works” with kids. (Although I’m sure it’s entirely different as a parent!)

I definitely second the opinion that having kids help you when you prepare foods is a great way of encouragement. Here’s a quick story to explain why…

The other night, I bought Pillsbury Reduced Fat cinnamon rolls (the kind you just plop into the oven) for a fun activity to do with my nephews. They LOVED helping out and even put the icing on themselves. They each ate MAYBE one and loved them! The next week, I was babysitting for them and since they had enjoyed “baking” so much the other night, their mother had bought another batch of cinnamon rolls for us to use – this time the regular variety. The kids helped me make them, and again both had the same amount as the night before. The key thing here is they noticed NO DIFFERENCE whatsoever. They were thrilled to be helping and see the finished product.

The message I got from all of this is that children depend on their parents, guardians, and role models entirely – and if healthful foods are made available, in a kid-friendly way – there will usually be no problem getting them to eat those foods. If unhealthy foods are more available than healthful ones – kids will probably orient towards those. I think it’s just important to encourage healthful eating without actually vocalizing it! As the saying goes, “Actions speak louder than words”.

And don’t worry Caitlin, you’ll be an awesome mom one day =)

What an interesting article, why I agree that kids shouldn’t be obsessing about being healthy. I grew up in a very food conscious household but my parents never obsessed about calories of fat content, but we had all whole-grain products, no trans fats or saturated fat and no processed food were aloud in our house. I grew up never having store bought cookies, white-sandwich bread or candy. We were aloud pop only when we were eating out and even then just one glass. I am really thankful for it now, as much as I was embarrassed by our family’s eating habits as a teen (my friends were freaked out by our baked organic blue corn chips with no salt and laughing because I though that Oreo cookies were a major treat). Now as a young adult when eating healthy is popular its easy for me to do it properly. Reading the article did make me think that some of the stuff I do is a little obsessive, like reading all the ingredient lists at the grocery store and that I wont buy anything that has any hydrogenate or altered oils including palm oil. But really I don’t think its a bad thing. The only real situations I have had is refusing to eat certain things, such as Kentucky Fried chicken at a party once (I politely just ate salad). I think in the long run, my families eating habits are good for me, I don’t have to work at it to eat well, I already dislike pop, and general prefer the healthier options since that is what I am use to.

I think more than anything, there is truth to the exposure theory. Kids aren’t born hating vegetables (although “bitter” tasting ones are genetically selected against usually). They like the familiar, so I just plan on having them always eat what’s in the house.

Someone's dad is awesome. 🙂

I agree that this goes for everything, not just food– the best thing we can do is provide kids with good examples and give them age-appropriate choices. I think you're going to be a great mom and will be pretty laid-back when it comes to your kids' eating, as long as they're happy & healthy. Definitely nothing like this article! 🙂

Like everyone else, I think that the key is teaching balance in the household. If kids are given whole, nutritious foods when they’re hungry, chances are those are what they’ll reach for themselves. I consider myself lucky that as a kid, I was given a whole tomato or apple (instead of chips) as a snack, but was never denied my once-a-week Burger King onion rings after Saturday morning soccer practice. Or as the mother of my one friend said: “I used to put out nothing but veggies and dip as a snack, and when they got hungry enough, they stopped whining and ate it.” 🙂

I read an article a while back that suggested the American “children’s menu” is breeding entitled, unhealthy eaters by conditioning their palates to a very limited number of bland, salty, “age-appropriate” options. I can’t help but think of cultures in which children are not given chicken fingers every time they eat in restaurants, but rather smaller portions of whatever the adults order, and how much more variety they expect and receive in their daily diets. I think that would be a huge start in this country, to stop sending kids the message that they are SUPPOSED to dislike vegetables or exotic flavors, or anything that is not socially-accepted “kid food.”

wow I need to think about this one…

I like watching how Jon & Kate of Jon & Kate Plus 8 go about feeding their kids. For the most part, they eat all organic, healthy foods but she doesn't freak if they get cake for their birthdays. She also doesn't give options at meal times. You eat what she serves or you wait until your next meal. It's made for a group of very nonpicky, healthy children. I figure if kids eat the healthy foods at home most of the time, it shouldn't be an issue if they have sweets once in a while.

It’s a tricky thing that I think I will worry about when I have kids someday. My parents emphasized eating healthfully, but I never developed an unhealthy relationship with food. I know one of my dietetic professors only offers her kids foods that are healthful; junk food is not an option for them, so they learn not to label foods as good or bad.

I really worry about this issue too, my parents eat pretty balanced, I was always raised with a veggie on my plate, I think if I do only one thing different from my parents it will be that you do not have to finish everything on your plate. I’m going to try my best when I have kids to give them a healthy balance but I hope not to get them obsessed with food in a bad way whatsoever, seems like a thin line though

love this convo! my mom always made one meal, and thats what everyone ate. even when we were babies, she just blended it down. i grew up liking all veggies. i even turned a little orange as a toddler from eating too many carrots! a favorite snack of mine was a cup of frozen peas, one that i still eat. my mom never talked about diet. those were just the foods we had and the foods we ate! and i still love all veggies, and think i eat pretty well 🙂 i plan on doing the same thing for my kids!

Very interesting article! I try my best just to be a good example to my kids…I don’t freak out too much about sweets, but I also don’t keep them around where they have access to them every day. My kids have always snacked on fruit, cheese, nuts, turkey, veggies…and the occasional not so healthy stuff. Its all about balance in my opinion. Hopefully as they get older they will just continue making healthy choices without it being an “issue”…and of course treat themselves without guilt!

Great post!

i read that article this morning too. i thought some of it was almost overreacting. the thing is, part of eating disorders is a kind of mentality, and in my opinion if someone is going to turn to anorexia or bulimia or whatever, they will find any reason to explain it to themselves, and extreme healthy eating is just one of the many reasons they tell themselves its okay to restrict. of course i realize that being obsessive about health food will probably damage your children’s relationship with food, you can damage that relationship in a lot of other ways (obsessing in front of the mirror, rewarding/punishing kids with food, etc) than just eating “too healthy.”
and i think the article took it a little too far. they almost made it sound bad that cafeterias are starting to focus on health, or that ED patients only eat organic food. so? shouldn’t we be happy that more people are placing more value on health?
i guess i’m just playing the devil’s advocate because there are always two sides of the story, but i definitely see the other side. and yes, i am worried about what i do when i have children especially cause i’m vegan…but that’s another story for another day!
but i wouldn’t worry too much, caitlin, cause your relationship with food seems to be very healthy, and that is what matters the most.

I read that article soon and had the same fear. I think we can take the same approach that we do for our own diets: everything in moderation. I think a kid should be able to enjoy a piece of cake and not have to think about calories or fat or sugar. In fact, I don’t know if I even want my child to know the word “calorie” except when it relates to energy before they’re pubescent. Is that crazy?